When I first heard, I was devastated and crying

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©David Black

“When I first heard, I was devastated and crying. It was just that initial reaction; you’re never prepared for that.  I just really feel like if he could have got it together and been happy on some level, the potential for really great music was there. The first time I met him was in 1996, I was touring with Those Bastard Souls. We were opening up for Sebadoh and Elliott was on first. It was before he had any real notoriety or fame, we hit it off, but he  was always in his own world. When we toured in 2000, I got to know him really well, I knew he was always struggling just to get through the day. For me, my fondest and most disturbing memory was when we did ecstasy together one night and we were listening to Elton John’s greatest hits. That song ‘Goodbye Yellow Brick Road’ came on and he started bawling his eyes out. I think Elliott had a thing about him. That obvious sadness and depression, it wasn’t fake at all and people will miss that a lot.”

Steve Drozd

When we were on tour together in 2000

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“When we were on tour together in 2000 and a couple of other times, he just broke down on me – I mean, everybody cries, but he was losing it really bad. It’d be six o’clock in the morning, we’d be drunk on the tour bus, and he’d just start crying his eyes out about the weirdest things. And I’ll be honest, every time I saw him after that tour, it got progressively worse. I think staying in L.A., he was doomed. I told him over and over to get the fuck out of there and go up to some small town in Oregon or something, but he never would.”

Steve Drozd

In my mind, I could totally see it being like

sdrozd

“In my mind, I could totally see it being like, ‘Hey I’m outta here, I’m gonna do a shot and OD – game over, see ya’. But it’s another thing to actually pierce yourself in the heart with a fucking knife. And that’s what we’ve all been talking about. It’s really weird that he would do it that way – or could do it that way.”

Steve Drozd